We are packing the mothership (aka HM Research Vessel Q7) with all the things one could possibly need for a 10 day road trip - we have bags, packs, golf clubs, laptops, cameras, dvd players, provisions and doggie-treats for everyone. I had no idea we would need so much gear for one expedition, but suffice it to say we might have to squeeze the mini-somnambulists (plus the underexercised hairy one) into the hideously expensive grey whale suppository that is now attached to the roof.
We have enough gear for a month in Outer Mongolia, but the truth is we are heading for somewhere much more remote and inaccessible - Soutern Cornwall.
Can't say I'm not looking forward to a break, and who knows when the next one will come... Probably just as well that I get off the spot desk anyway. Trywalker's looking forward to having his real boss back, and after I made FVJ stand up and shout out to the entire trading floor "I F+++ED UP!" he has been in a bit of a grumpy mood. I can't see why, it must have been the biggest round of applause in his young life... Still while such displays of public trainee humiliation have their necessary place in Investment Bank dealing rooms, ATIA offices will of course be a caring, sensitive environment where everyone sits on fluffy cappuccino clouds and is exceptionally nice to each other...
I will endeavour to make a few posts while on the road, although that will depend upon how far down the Cornish peninsula that the wireless revolution has penetrated...
The Somnambulists hit the road...
8 comments:
So glad you remembered to pack the cow - very convenient for snacks .... safe journey and don't eat too many ice-creams with clotted cream ....
Has the underexercised hairy one been at the tinned mincemeat or something? He is developing a particularly mad bovine facial appearance - has he started quacking too?
So anyway, now you've destroyed what little coffee-fetching substance there was left in FVJ (and potentially oiled the gargantuan wheels of the beestreesfart (you'll need to explain that particular beast to your loyal readers at some point because I'm f+++ed if I care enough or understand it enough to try) machinery - I'll put any citations in your drawer btw) and given my protege a hard enough time that for the first time in history (since you last sat at my desk anyway) he's actually looking forward to my return, you have the bad taste to do a bit of pre-holiday gloat? I won't go as far as to say I hope it snows in Cornwall, although some ice showers are on the wish list.
You'd better leave me your problogging box so I can retreat from the new boss and boss' boss btw.I might be inclined to voice an opinion otherwise...
@DP - you can't go wrong with your own cow.. it's almost like having an ice-cream dispenser in the car on permanent tap. Well, maybe more of a clotted cream dispenser...
@Der UDH Junge - Do I sense a little returning-from-holiday stress between the lines there? Don't worry about FVJ, I have cheered him up by putting him on Skandis for the next two days. That should give you and him plenty to re-bond about next Monday.
The Beestreesfart I am afraid cannot be explained. It can only be witnessed. In that respect it has certain religious connotations. That's the best I can do....
Did I mention I am going on holiday?
Good luck with the t'internet connection in Cornwall!!! My teen is in South Wales.... with her dad. Cost me the price of a shiny new lappytop so she can be a typical 21st C teen and sit hypnotised on MSN... but alas there is no t'internet (eek or mobile phone rays either oops!!!)
Hey ho I am off to Madrid on Saturday for a girlie week yippeeee (such a bad mother *snigger*)
You made some poor devil stand up and annouce to the trading floor that he f****d up? ROFL! I'd love to have seen it. It'll do him good.
Have a great time in Cornwall! Maybe there won't be any ice-storms. ;)
@70steen - staying in a lovely B&B in Lostwithiel that has all the mod-cons such as bathrooms and free wifi-connection.
penrosebb.co.uk is highly recommended for anyone travelling this way.
Have a fab & groovy time in Madrid!
@Jay - Please don't think that ritual embarrassment of juniors is part of our regular management techniques ;-) We are normally pretty soft and cuddly (well, sort of)... unless the spot monkeys get really, really, really, really annoying. FVJ, like all trainees makes lots and lots of mistakes, which is fine - that's the only way you learn. But NONE of them are ever remotely his fault or responsibility, and there is ALWAYS a long, unnecessary, convoluted explanation of mitigating circumstances that elicits a collective groan from everyone in the vicinity at the time (see previous post on bullsh+t ;-) )
It was overdue...
Too right it was overdue, I am just annoyed it wasn't me that got to deliver it, or even witness it, and now he'll be all surly and his coffee fetching abilities will have been impaired. That is a disaster, considering it'll be hellish enough returning to work on the same day as SB and his metre long bottom lip and two chipped shoulders, with no Rambler to share salient thoughts with over a choc hobnob and Trywalker revving up for his holiday later in the week. I will need coffee delivery to be efficient next week, and you've gone and ruined it! If I use the ankle dangler / fire escape training exercise and it all goes wrong (if I don't have enough coffee my grip can be faltering you know...) you will have blood on your hands Dr Rambler. Everyone here cyber witnessed your sabotage ;)
Yes, kind of a shame you weren't there. I think you would have seen the funny side. In a kind of rolling on the floor splitting your sides kind of way ;-)
I forgot SB was back next week. And Trywalker on hols... Did I mention that I am moving to Cornwall, permanently? As of tomorrow.
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